Sentance: Death
by titangirl161
Summary: Rin has unknowingly failed the exorcist exam, and is marked for execution. Yukio is working through his feelings for his brother when he gets the news, in the worst way possible. How will the brothers cope with this? First BE fanfic, SLIGHT AU (see note inside)
1. Prologue

Friends and haters, I'm back, finally writing a multi-chaptered story again! Yay, my first Blue Exorcist fic! This one came to me as a dream, so I don't really know the ending, but I'm sure it will come to me as I go along! Be warned! This story will have family cuteness and a few angst bombs as well. So before I begin:

NOTE 1- I DO NOT WRITE YAOI. But I LOVE CUTENESS. So there will be fluffy family cuteness! You are free to view it anyway you want, however, I ask that you please don't leave me reviews telling me exactly HOW you're seeing it (if this hadn't already happened to me several times, it wouldn't be an issue, so I wouldn't have to make a note of it). And-

NOTE 2- this takes place before the events of the festival, so there will be no spoilers, rest assured! However, it's slight AU because it's AFTER they take the Exorcist Exam- that's a MAJOR plot point. Just wanted to clear that up. Now my puppy-muse Scribble will do the disclaimer and we will begin!

Scribble: We do not own Blue Exorcist, that belongs to Kazue Kato and because a certain someone would rather use her money to buy the mangas instead, we will never own it. So don't sue us, we are broke- remember that part about buying mangas?

Many thanks to beta and friend What2callmyself? for making this intelligible!

Prologue

In the times when Father Fujimoto was still alive, when Rin and Yukio were children, when Rin was blissfully unaware of what he really was and Yukio wanted to be strong like his older twin someday, there was one way that Yukio was stronger than his brother.

For whatever reason, Rin did not like stormy nights. It wasn't even thunder and lightning, or if it rained during the day, it was fine. But Rin just could not sleep well on stormy nights. And on such nights, after much tossing and turning, Rin always did the same thing: he climbed into Yukio's bed.

While Rin could sleep through an earthquake, Yukio was a pretty light sleeper, so whenever Rin crawled into his bed, he felt it immediately and woke. Yukio would always ask what was wrong and Rin would immediately deny being scared or upset (not realizing Yukio hadn't said a word about either of those), and finally Yukio would smile, shift over and pull his older brother close to him. Yukio had always been a little taller than Rin (much to Rin's chagrin) and when he pulled his brother to him, Rin's head would end up tucked under Yukio's, against his chest so he could hear his heartbeat, which always relaxed Rin. And Yukio would softly reassure him, that he didn't need to worry, that Yukio was there and would always be there for him.

In those times when they were younger, Yukio often wished he could be more like his older brother. Rin wasn't afraid of anything, or anyone. If there were bullies picking on him, Rin would be the one to run to his defense, and sometimes beat up the bullies too. Rin would always find a solution for every problem and would never give up. Rin truly was able to do everything Yukio couldn't.

And so, in the stormy nights of their youth, Yukio was glad he finally could do something his twin couldn't. It was just this one small thing, but this was one way in which Yukio could finally be the one protecting Rin.

Scribble: That was short.

Me: It's just a prologue! Yukio wanted to protect Rin even then! So, the first chapter will be out soon, and we'll get this story underway! Let me know what you guys think! Flames that tell me I suck without telling me how to improve are worthless and will be laughed at. Constructive Criticism is helpful and is appreciated. And Good reviews are always loved! So until next time! Long Live the Exorcist Cram School!

-titangirl161


	2. Chapter 1: Worries and Nerves

Here I am everyone, back for the next chapter! Here the actual PLOT begins! How many of you are exited? *No hands* Siiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. Oh well, let's get this started. Scribble?

Scribble: We do not own Blue Exorcist. We do this for fun and entertainment only- and because the authoress has some messed up dreams.

Me: *throws a manga at him* Don't question my subconscious! Now onto the story!

And thank you W2cm for once again beta-ing a story for a manga you don't even read! (And even listen to me rant and rave about it! ^_^U)

Chapter 1: Worries and Nerves

Rin lay on his bed, reading manga (it was actually his brother's copy of Jump Square) and while he looked relaxed, his tail was swishing nervously back and forth and Rin sighed, his head flopping down. Not even the manga could calm him today.

It was a little while after the Exorcist Exam, and while they hadn't gotten the results back yet, Rin was incredibly nervous. After all, it was only his life that was depending on this test. As far as he was aware, his execution would be withdrawn as long as he passed the Exorcist Exam- IF he passed, being the key part. Rin notoriously sucked at school, not at all the good student like Yukio was, and even knowing his life was literally on the line, it was hard to get him to sit still and study for long.

Not to say he didn't try. He studied a lot with Bon, and Shima, and Konekomaru. He even managed to get Izumo to help him study a few times. And of course Shiemi was more than willing to help him out in any way she could.

And of course, having his brother -also his teacher- on his back about it, he spent several nights with Yukio trying to concentrate on studying so he could pass this stupid test.

But now he was definitely regretting it. That test had been hard. REALLY HARD. Even with the amount he studied and how confident he felt going in, he came out feeling like a zombie. And honestly, he had no idea how well -or how badly- he did. He knew his grade was not going to be super -his grades never were- but he didn't THINK he did too badly. But did he do well enough to pass? He wasn't sure. It would be close; he knew that much- but would be just passing, or just failing? And if he failed…they really were going to execute him, weren't they?

How would they go about that? Would they just kidnap him out of his room and he'd wake up at the main headquarters in a cell one morning? Or would it be assassination style; he'd be walking along and suddenly BAM, shot in the head and he would be gone? Or maybe-

Rin shook his head violently. It was no use worrying about it like this. He just wanted a little time to relax and not think about it.

But Lady Luck was not on his side today, just as he tried to get back to reading, who should walk in but Yukio.

Yukio took one look over to the bed where Rin was resting and then it began.

"Nii-san, what are you doing just lazing around? And…hey! Isn't that mine?!"

"I was just borrowing it! And I was just taking a break for a second!"

"A break, huh?" His eyes narrowed at his older twin.

"Yeah!" Rin defiantly declared.

"So, how much of your homework have you done?" Yukio challenged.

Rin wasn't quite expecting that. To tell the truth, he had started some math, but that was all. "Ummm…some math…some of it I didn't get…,"he mumbled.

"And were you going to leave it blank?" Yukio asked sternly.

"No! I was going to ask you for some help!" Rin snapped defensively.

"Ok…how about English? If I remember correctly, you got a zero on your last test."

"Uhhhhhhh…."

"You didn't even look at it, did you?"

"I was going to…" Rin mumbled.

"Nii-san, you can't just keep putting these things off! You need to concentrate on your schoolwork!"

"But I didn't come here to go to school! I came here to be an exorcist!"

"Oh? And how is that going? How did you do on the test?"

At the mention of the test, Rin froze like a deer in headlights. "I…I don't know yet…we haven't gotten back the results…"

"You came here to do that, and you couldn't even take that test seriously?!"

"I did too! I studied for it! All the others can attest to that, I studied with them!"

"Nii-san, you know what will happen if you fail that test! They're going to execute you!"

"Of course I remember, spotty four-eyes! You think I don't get it? I know it better than anyone!"

"Then how can you be so relaxed about it?! You never take anything seriously!"

"What good is worrying over it going to do me?! The test is over! What's done is done! I can't change it now!"

"Even that attitude says you're taking it too lightly!"

"So I should go crazy worrying about it? I can't be that way, I'm not like you!"

At that last statement, Yukio looked absolutely furious, and Rin knew immediately that that had been the wrong thing to say. "You're not like me, is that so? Well, tell me, what's wrong with that?" Yukio asked slowly, his voice low and dangerous.

"No, nothing! That's not what I meant, really!" Rin tried to repair the situation.

"Then what did you mean?" Yukio tone remained cold.

Rin desperately fumbled in his mind for something that could fix this quickly. "I meant…it's just…."

He wasn't quick enough. With one last look of contempt, Yukio turned on his heel to leave.

"Wait, Yukio!" Rin tried to call to him, but it was too late, Yukio walked out, slamming the door behind him.

~Later~

Dinner was pretty awkward.

Neither Yukio nor Rin knew what to say to each other at this point, so they just sat in silence. And because the two of them were in the old abandoned building, the silence itself was near deafening.

Rin ate as quickly as he could, and immediately started working on the dishes, anything to keep his mind occupied on other things. When Yukio was done, he found it hard to go up to the sink. Truthfully, he had cooled down a little, but was still angry at Rin, and wanted him to stew in his guilt a little longer. But somehow it still pained him to see Rin, his strong older brother, acting like a wounded puppy. He very quickly put his dishes in the sink and headed to the door without stopping.

He wasn't quick enough either. "Yukio…I'm sorry…."

Yukio stopped dead at Rin's soft words, hand frozen with a dish still in it, but not daring to turn to look at his younger brother. Not as though it mattered- Yukio couldn't possibly face Rin now. "It's fine, Nii-san," he said softly before leaving, letting the door shut softly behind him.

He hurried back to his room and got into bed quickly. He felt even worse now. What was the point of making his older brother feel guiltier than he already felt? He heard Rin enter soon after, and Rin also started getting ready for bed too, while Yukio feigned sleeping, still not feeling up to facing him right now.

That night, as Yukio tossed restlessly, he heard the sound of the wind howling outside, followed by the pattering of raindrops on the roof. It was raining.

He actually wasn't sure what would happen from here. He was curious- would Rin climb into his bed, like he always used to? Or would he stay away, still upset about their fight?

Rin tossed and turned (much longer than he usually did, Yukio thought later) but finally gave up. He tried to sneak into Yukio's bed very slowly, so as not to wake his brother, but it made no difference -Yukio was already awake. "Nii-san?" he asked softly.

Rin froze. "I just…sorry, I didn't mean to wake you, I'll leave you alone."

Yukio grabbed his arm just as he was about to get up. "It's fine, Nii-san. You can sleep here."

Rin hesitated.

"I wasn't asleep, Nii-san. I have to go down to the Vatican tomorrow, and was up thinking about it." This was true, at least the first part.

Rin thought for a minute, then mumbled, "Alright," and lay down next to him. Yukio pulled him close -even though both had grown, Yukio was still taller, and Rin's head still tucked underneath his perfectly. "So you'll be gone tomorrow?" he asked Yukio as he leaned against Yukio's chest.

"Yeah, I'm getting up early to go. I guess you'll be sleeping in, since it's a weekend."

"Well, I could also start on my homework," he mumbled, a bit sheepishly, as he listened to his younger twin's heartbeat next to his head.

Yukio smiled. "Alright, Nii-san." He could almost feel Rin relaxing as he held him close. He whispered to him, just like when they were younger. "It's alright, Nii-san. Everything will be alright. I'm right here, I'm right beside you. I'll always be here." He could tell by Rin's breathing that he was asleep, and he whispered softly, more to himself. "You don't need to worry -just like I promised Father; I'll protect you, always." And soon he fell asleep deeply himself.

It would be the last peaceful sleep he would have in a while.

~Elsewhere~

At the Vatican, the top members were meeting. "Have we gotten Okamura's test results?" one asked.

"Yes."

"And?"

There was a pause. And then, "He failed."

The first bowed his head. "Then we have no choice. He will be executed. And I have already chosen his executioner."

Scribble: Wow, way to drop that bomb, right at the end of a cute first chapter!

Me: It's to build suspense, you know? After all, how can there even be a story if he passed? Well, here's the first chapter of the story! I tried really, really hard to not make the brothers sound too OOC -they do often argue like that, so I hope I didn't do too badly. So let me know what you think! Worthless flames are given to Rin who turns them to blue flames back at said flamers. Con crit is appreciated. And good reviews are loved! The next chapter will be out soon, so until next time! Long Live the Exorcist Cram School!

-titangirl161


	3. Chapter 2: Understanding

(Note: This was supposed to come out a week ago, but I'm apologizing because I refuse to apologize for being in the hospital)

Wooo, here we are at the second chapter! Are you excited? Cause I am! It's been so long since doing a multi-chaptered fic, it feels nice to be writing one again! Ok, let's get started! Take it away Scribble!

Scribble: We do not own Blue Exorcist, nor do we own At The Stars, the music inspiration for this chapter (obscure songs FTW!). So don't sue us now.

Thanks to beta W2cm-chan for beta-ing but NO THANKS FOR TAKING OUT ALL MY BEAUTIFUL COMMAS! [Drama queen it's only a few… 3]

Chapter 2: Understanding

Yukio was awoken early that morning by his cell phone alarm. As usual, Rin slept soundly through it until Yukio turned it off. He turned back to look at his brother's sleeping face before he left. He thought of saying goodbye to him, but Rin seemed to be sleeping so peacefully he felt he couldn't possibly wake him. Not to mention he usually couldn't wake Rin anyway, seeing as he slept like a rock.

He pulled out the key that would take him straight to the Vatican, and wasn't surprised to see Shura waiting for him right outside the door. "Well, you're bright and early, as usual."

"I'm professional, maybe you can try it sometime," Yukio snapped back at her.

"How rude!" she commented as the two walked to the main building. Shura was saying something, but Yukio couldn't concentrate -there had been another reason he hadn't wanted to wake his brother.

He had a nightmare last night, about his fight against Todou. The man had told him to be completely honest -and he had.

"_I love and hate my brother!"_

He had meant it when he said it, but when he thought about it now, sometimes it bothered him. Maybe it was the fact that the two of them had been fighting last night, and yes, Yukio often felt frustrated with Rin. But…he HATED him? Wasn't that a bit much?

"Hey, are you even listening?" Shura snapped him out of his musings.

He shook his head, trying to clear it. "Sorry," he mumbled.

Shura took a step away. "Hey, kid, are you alright? Being this spacey is more like Rin, not you."

Yukio twitched at the mention of his twin. "We're two different people, you know."

"Which is why I expect you to act like it! Seriously, what's been eating you?"

Yukio sighed. "It's nothing -it just has to do with the battle I had with Todou."

Shura immediately stepped up in front of him. "Hey, Yukio, you can't keep beating yourself up over that! You and a whole group of monks were useless, and you all did all you could! You need to stop worrying yourself about it."

Yukio shook his head. "It's not about that -it's about what I told him- when I told him that I loved and hated Nii-san at the same time." He paused, as to let it sink in. "I guess that makes me a pretty horrible person, though, hating my own brother…" he trailed off, not knowing where else to go.

Shura looked steadily at him then turned forward again before speaking. "No, that doesn't make you a horrible person at all -in fact, it sounds pretty normal to me."

Yukio turned to her, amazed. "You think that's normal?"

"It would be less normal if you didn't feel that way, with the way the two of you are. It's very simple -you hate your brother BECAUSE you love your brother."

"Be-Because I love nii-san…?"

"You wouldn't be able to hate him if you didn't love him. Love and hate are both very strong feelings on opposite sides of the same coin, so it's very easy to flip between them."

"I-I don't think I understand."

Shura sighed. "It's like this. You two are brothers, even more, twins. You were born together, and grew up together. You know everything about each other. You're the only family the other has. You are the closest to each other. And because of all of those things, you love your brother, and you want to protect him. And he wants to protect you too, because you're his younger brother, and he loves you too. But Rin is reckless, runs head first into things without thinking, and makes dangerous decisions that could get him hurt or into trouble. And you hate that. You want so much to protect him that it almost feels like he's doing it purposefully just to make your life harder. And you hate that he makes you worry. And you hate that you worry about him because the only reason you worry about him is because you love him, and if you didn't have to worry about him you wouldn't hate him either, so you also then begin to hate the fact that you love him, because he made you love him and now you have to worry about him and you hate that he can make you worry, but even through that you still can't hate him for too long because you love him, and…" Shura suddenly trailed off and Yukio almost chuckled to himself, knowing that Shura had just revealed something in herself a little too personal. "I think you get the point. But I don't know if I'm making sense or not anymore."

But Yukio understood. What Shura said made sense. In fact, it summed up everything Yukio had already knew he felt but tied it all together in the way that explained everything. He felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of him, and smiled. "No, it's alright, I understand. It definitely helped."

Shura grinned. "You're welcome, you brat."

And so Yukio felt much better as he made his way in, not knowing how horrible he would feel on his way out.

"Yukio Okumura, your mission is to assassinate Rin Okumura."

Scribble: A CLIFFHANGER?

Me: Yeah, I had planned it especially like that. Yukio has been given the worst kind of mission, what will he do? What can he do? You'll have to stay tuned to find out! So let me know how it was! Worthless flames are worthless. Con crit is helpful. Good reviews are loved! Not sure when the next chapter will come out, but it shouldn't be too long, so until then! Long Live the Exorcist Cram School!

-titangirl161


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